[[*---Branched Over Me---*]]

Sunday, October 29, 2006

[[finally...]]

so much has happened... n i am too lazy to blogged. most significant of all i could sae is interclass soccer. haiz... 3L got knocked out. reason: too many defensive players. our defence is gd and solid, but we cannot score goals. and no goals = no qualification. on the other hand the finalists 3R i have to sae is a very exciting class. their defense is so so, but walau the attk is pro sia. sam koh michael bin and hanlin combo. SICK. walau their passing n shooting. no wonder like dose 3 are the top scorers. on the other hand one of the fav 3P qualified. thx to gareth. i have to sae he is the soul of their team. but well i wonder if tze ern and merrill can keep bin n skoh out... hmm.. might be a free scoring n high tempo match.. exciting...

n my CT are scrweed up. omg. siao one. so damn bloody mother low. wtf lah. now i have to count on my history and physics. zzz. shit man...

[[ Branched ]]*|12:10 pm|

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

[[melbourne!!!]]

omg omg melbourne trip is so FREAKING FUN. holy shit. best part is get to miss 4 CTs. yay.

met at changi aiport at 9.10pm. diao. so early lol. have to wait like 2 hrs to get on plane. meanwhile walk around wif the trio of timo, ah gong and wank. drank starbucks and look at random shops.

haha melbourne is pretty cold. for me lah lol. the rest are like dun even wanna wear jacket. wateva. melbourne is pretty like singapore lah. the yarra river is DAMN like singapore river. and all the shops around the river. damn like clarke quay. omg. den eat at a food court. eat sum lebanese wrap. cool. but weird. dun really like the sour sauce lol. den took foto. went on a cruise haha. ride sum farni train. den go our service apartment: Quest on Lygon. den had dinner nearby. omg its damn cool the restaurant. haha. lygon is the italian area of melbourne. den we eat at an italian restaurant duh lol. n the shop is damn nicely decorated. omg. italian football team, esp the 2006 world cup winning team. haha suan the aussies. den got ferrari. lots of F1. and of cos fotos of chio football supporters. heehee. looks like female chio bu football fans are welcome all around the world. the atmosphere is pro. n the pizza pwns the pizaa hut one. omg nice. n nv knew the bread n butter so zai. eat like hell haha. beats plain rice man.

de next day quite sian. prep for competition. damn degen in teh room. argh... only at nite is the opening ceremony. den the dinner. cool. but screwed up. cos the dinner is meant to meet ppl overseas and stuff. but well our team was seated next to RGS... diao. im sure lah. but HCI best, their team so big. 1 entire table all of dem. lol. im sure. but the food was pretty ok. its just dat its pizza again. wth... haha the salad is nice. but the veggies taste a bit funny and makes me nauseous. but still managecd to finish it. n the ice cream. oh n had damn lot of pepsi.

de next day is competition proper. quite ok lah. manage to finish on time. yay. n ah gong wrote damn lot for action plan. well. anyway aft a lousy packed lunch. ok its quite nice actually. but its cold. lol. the sandwich is pretty ok. beats dose 7 eleven crap. den our skit. lol. i fell asleep a bit. den i realize how little time 3hrs is for a prep for skit. lol. we did like 2 rehearsals only. lousy. but it went pretty fine lah. we gave our all. i was like heck lah, just act dumb n happy and lala. who cares man. shld be more thick skinned man.

anywya the next dae is announcement. morning went to st kilda's beach. the trams are cool man. damn nice. esp the modern ones. conducive for slping. haha. the handrest is zai. n $2.50 for 1 whole dae of free ride. omg. lol. shop like hell for presents and stuff. n finally ate my gelato! its an italian ice cream dat is low fat n is fantastic in aust. but hell it was cold cos of wind and rain. omg. siaozors. my hands were so numb couldnt feel anyting lol. den went back aft lunch for the results lol. so nervous man. esp wank. he was pretty restless. well we were damn relived aft hearing we were first. ok not relieved. ecstatic. man. timo was gay. wank was siao. i tink i was the most calm one. lol. madness. anyway chelsia's CMPS grp won their category. no wonder wank so happy. but well i feel sorry for yanhan's fair trade. tot they would have won it. so zai. i see the presentation it is pretty gd. solid. dey were so passionate. haiz... so unlucky. wonder where did they go wrong. ah wellz... hope she cheers up. saw her cry. so sad...

den the nite is the last bit of shopping. den flight back to singapore. onboard watch X3. woah zai. pity at the end started to fall asleep a little. a bit tired n shagged i guess. ah well nvm. den went home via mrt.

and todae maths test was gh3y. honestly i dun tink its hard. its just dat cos of competition i didnt do enuff revision. now for bio and physics. gonna get screwed. conc so much on bio, didnt touch physics. now i forgot a little of bio oso. omg. siao. shit. only rmb fotosynthesis. still got respiration and immune system. dead.

[[ Branched ]]*|1:56 pm|

Monday, October 09, 2006

[[nostalgia]]

todae i felt really emotional when i got home. missed dem so much. really, couldnt set my mind str8 to mug or prepare for fps. when i went down to the coffeeshop to eat, i realize dat the food sux, n suddenly i haf a craving for home cooked food. if only she could b back to cook for me, if only...

but life goes on.

anyway tried to do sum fps stuff. read our research until i buay tahan. shit man. the bio stuff in my man is like full liao, still haf to pack in maths n healthcare access. omg. i tink i gonna run out of creative stuff liao for the ting. anyway melbourne trip is 2 days away. haha. but after dat incident frankly i dun feel so enthu abt it anymore. but well, stay enthu n b cheerful. shldnt drag down other ppl's spirits. ppl like timo lol. so high. sohai.

dis few days keep worrying whether i've packed enuff. shit man. i kept having dreams dat i go airport den forgot to bring passport. shit i damn scared n paranoid now.

zzz 2 more days. den come back to singapore n endure CTs. lol. i tink i shall change my focus to maths. cos i forgot remainder theorem liao. need practice to recall dem. haiz...

[[ Branched ]]*|10:41 pm|

Friday, October 06, 2006

[[mid-autumn festival]]

today is mid-autumn festival, a day in chinese customs when families r suppose to be together and admiring the full moon...

[[ Branched ]]*|11:48 pm|

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

[[regret...]]

In the end, it still happened for the boy. He thought that that day would still be faraway, until now…

When it was still normal, when his mom and sis were still with him, he sometimes wish so hard for them to go away, to get out of his life, to stop meddling in ‘his’ affairs. But he was foolish then, he was ignorant, stupid even. Remember when someone told you that when the day really comes for you to leave your parents, you wouldn’t want to let go, even if sometimes you really want them to vapourize. The boy understood that now. He realize how hard it is really to let go. Blood is thicker than water. He finally understands why kinship is such a powerful force that binds so many people together.

When he first heard the news, he was ignorant and couldn’t care less. He was thinking that finally he could be left alone, do whatever he wants, sleep whenever he likes. Nobody would be there to stop him from playing computer games, nobody would be bugging him to go do housework. Nobody.

However, as the days draw near, as he converse to his mom about the subject, he realizes the dilemma his mom was going thru. He witnessed for the first time his mom cried in front of him. He isn’t so enthusiastic about the change anymore…

On the day before the departure, the ‘last dinner’, he suddenly feels so sad, like there’s a great big void in him. He realized how much truly his sis and mom meant to him. He realized that family still holds a big part of his heart and emotional life. As he eats and looks at his sis, his mom, he suddenly wants time to stop. For he knew that: gone are the days that his sis would chase him around the living room; gone are the days when his mom would call him and ask him whether he’s coming home for dinner; gone are the days when he would comment on his mom’s cooking; gone are the days when his family would go out together; gone are those days…

As he looked at the scenes for the last time, he felt that he really really aged. He became tired and wanted it all to stop. He didn’t want his mom and sis to leave him. Alas, he couldn’t relive the final moments together in the house properly, because he still has school the next day, his mom is nagging him to go to sleep, probably for the last time.

The next day, the day of departure. He felt ok in school; he did the usual stuff, talk the usual rubbish, crack the usual jokes. He thought that moment would never come. But still, time passes. As he goes from school to airport, his heart got heavier, and heavier, and heavier and heavier… When he saw his mom and sis, he was happy yet sad at the same time. As his mom asked him what he wanna eat, he suddenly realized that he isn’t hungry all along, he just wants to spend the final moments together with the 2 most impt female in his life. And on the way to the terminal, he saw his mom’s eyes redden with tears, again. He looked away, and tried to divert the topic of separation. He didn’t want to talk about it. He wanna avoid it as much as possible. And so the trio sat in the waiting hall, as time ticks and they enjoy the quality time that they will miss soon.

As the boy eats the fruit peeled by his mom, he was filled with nostalgia. He still remembers the time when his mom would be angrily calling him to go eat the fruits, and peel it himself. He would be grumbling and reluctantly eating it. He felt guilty and wasteful. Never had he tasted a pear and mango so sweet in his life, as if it was laced with the honey of love.

But still the moment finally came, as the mother and son were talking over the fruits, the mom began to sob again. She couldn’t hold back her tears anymore. She had to leave her child alone in a foreign country. At that time the sister cried, for no apparent reason, probably because she saw her mom crying and don’t know what to do. The boy felt awkward and useless. He didn’t know how to console his mom. All he could say were a pathetic few generic lines of console. He hated himself for that. In his heart, he felt like crying too. His eyes were beginning to turn wet. But he held back the tears; he knew that he could not cry. At that time he must be the pillar to his mom and sis. He must provide that emotional support. He must show his mom that he is strong, if not how would she trust him to live on his own?

Finally it’s the time to leave, his mom burst into tears after a period of calm. He hugged his mom for a long time. His mom was crying into his chest. He couldn’t take it anymore. He cried. At that moment he felt the meaning of true love, the bonds a mother and son share. His mom asked him whether she is selfish. He said no. He understood his mom’s plight. He knew how stressed out and tired she is everyday. He wants his mom to have a better life back at their homeland. He then hugged his sis, who cried too. As he watched the duo pass the checkpoint through the glass panel, as he sees them disappear around the corner, he was finally hit hard by the truth. His mom isn’t with him anymore. He walked to the toilet, and the tears that he held back for so long flowed out. He cried all the way on the bus. He cried on the MRT. He cried.

As he stepped back into the house, he remembers fondly of his wonderful times there. Now, the furniture’s changed. Everything looks so eerily clean and neat now. He isn’t used to it. Yet he knew that he must get used to it. He trudged to his room, and made a call to his dad. He started sobbing uncontrollably again. The entire conversation was frequently interrupted with sobs. He had read his letter on his table left by his mom. He realized how much love his mom had for him all this while. The boy was blind to not feel it. He wished so much that it would all come back to him, so that he can cherish those moments once more. He told his father to take care of his sis and mom. He promised him that he would go back during his hols.

Now, the boy feels a bit better. He knows that he is lucky. He is blessed with great friends, kind tenants and helpful neighbours. He knows who to approach for help. He has soulmates to share his sorrows. He believed in his friends. But still, he wants it all back so much. He can only regret now as he watches his most valuable possession snatched away from him. He knew this day will come, but he didn’t expect it to be so soon. Now, he just has to get on with his life. Alone.

[[ Branched ]]*|9:51 pm|